Together At Last
by shelma32
Summary: After the experience with Kolya, no one was listening to John when he said that he was alright. No one except for Elizabeth..... Most of this was done as a joint post with a friend of mine


**Disclaimer: **Unfortunately, I do not own any of the characters or anything to do with the world of Stargate.

**Spoilers:** Conversion.

**Warnings:** Character death.

John had been walking through the city, lost in his thoughts. Something had been bugging him for a few days and he couldn't quite place it. Ever since they had come back from the last mission, something seemed different.

Elizabeth sat in her office, trying to work on paperwork and previous mission reports. She couldn't get images of John Sheppard's aging face out of her mind. She knew that Kolya had it out for them, but this was too much for her to bear. She had gotten close to John, but to see a Wraith feed on him was too much and she had been about to hand Laden over.

He could feel the eyes on him, watching him as he walked past. John wanted to scream at them that he was alright, but no one seemed to be listening. Everyone was treating him differently. Carson kept on coming up to him and asking if he was alright, sometimes just 15 minutes apart. Everything was getting on his nerves. He needed something to do. Suddenly, he found himself outside Elizabeth's office, knocking on the glass.

She looked up, surprised to see John out of the infirmary. She leaned back in her chair. "Why are you out of the infirmary? Did Carson release you?" Deep down, Elizabeth felt off being alone with him. She was afraid that she would say something or do something wrong. She remembered when the Iratus bug had changed him thanks to Ellia. "John, are you okay?"

"Ya know..." he said, walking in and rubbing the back of his head with his hand, the other in his pocket "... everyone keeps asking me that. I'm honestly fine... never felt better in fact".

"Oh, alright." She turned her attention back to what she was doing, her peripheral vision watching him sit down. "What's going on?"

"Nothing..." he said, walking up to her desk. "Just wondered if there were any missions coming up".

"There are." Knows it wouldn't do her good to lie to him. "And before you ask, no, you can't go."

John looked at her. "WHAT? Why the hell not? Elizabeth I'm fine"!

"No, you're not." She looked up at him, determination in her green eyes. "You're not fine, John. You haven't even seen Heightmeyer like you were ordered to." Shakes her head. "No. You're on stand-down until further notice."

John gritted his teeth before turning and storming out of the office. Why wouldn't anyone listen to him?! He felt absolutely fine. He felt better than he ever had in his entire life. As he walked through the control room, he saw Carson coming towards him once more. "I'm fine"!! He shouted, walking past him

"JOHN!"

He continued to walk away from her, wanting to clear his head and get away from all the stares.

She jumped up and ran after him. "John, I'm sorry. Please. Talk to me if you won't talk to anyone else." She pulled him outside onto an empty balcony.

John's eyes looked down at her. He then turned and leant against the railing, his face looking at the floor. "Why won't anyone listen to me? I feel fine"

"We care. We just want to make sure." She watched him, the breeze barely moving the spikes of his hair. She resisted the urge to run her fingers through them.

He looked at her. "I know." John answered, sighing heavily. "Its just a little frustrating to have everyone looking at you but no one listening to a word you say".

"I'm sorry. I should listen to you." Nods softly, her hair touching her shoulders as she looked at him. "John, I need you to know that I was terrified. I was about to hand Laden over.'

John turned to face her, his arms crossed. "Yeah... you were terrified" he said before turning away once more.

"John, I can't begin to imagine what you're going through. What you went through." Walks up to him and puts a hand on his upper arm. "I'm here now. And I don't want to lose you."

He looked at her hand briefly. "I don't intend on going anywhere".

"Good." She gently turned him. "John..."

"Hmm"?

Putting leadership aside, she lunges at him and hugs him, holding onto him tightly.

John looked down at her with surprise. Now this was new he thought. Not knowing what else to do, he slow put his arms around her, his eyes looking off into the distance.

She looked up at him and leaned in, capturing his lips with hers as her hand pulled his face down closer, her other hand staying at the small of his back.

Pulling his head back in confusion, John looked down at her, his brow furrowed. "What was that about"? He asked.

She steps back. "I'm sorry!" She walked over to the other side of the balcony, ashamed of what she had just done.

Taking in a deep breath, John walked to her side, looking down at her. "Elizabeth"?

"I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry." She doesn't turn around.

John placed his hand on her shoulder, turning her around slightly. "It's fine... Look, Elizabeth. Don't worry about it". He said, his eyes smiling at her. _/Elizabeth actually kissed me... okay... it was new... nice, but new.../_

She nodded, her hands having nowhere to go but her sides, but finds them on his waist. "I just...I don't want anything worse to happen to you."

He smiled at her concern. "I hope that nothing does happen coz that really would ruin my plans for the rest of my life" he joked. _/... plans that include you.../_

"Good. Because I'll be damned if you leave anytime soon." She slid her hands up his back, under his grey and black team jacket. "John, I was so scared."

John smiled, swallowing hard as he felt her hands on his back_. /... keep it together John.../_ "I know..." he said quietly.

"John, when Kolya had that thing sucking on you, I was one minute from sending Laden to him. But when you looked at the camera, it was as if you were looking at me in person." She stepped closer and put her head on his chest, listening to his pounding heart.

John closed his eyes as her led on his chest. _/Oh boy, what am I supposed to do now? She already kissed me? Do I kiss her... keep it together John/_ He tilted his head downwards slightly.

She looked up, feeling a change in his posture and was about to ask him if he was alright.

He swallowed once more, unsure of what to do, as he closed his eyes.

She watched him, wondering what was going through his mind.

_/What am I supposed to do? Should I kiss her? ... I want to kiss Elizabeth?! When the hell did this happen/_ Slowly, his eyes opened.

She continues to look at him, about to pull away. "I'm sorry. I should go."

John's arms stopped her, wrapping around her. _/What am I doing/_

She looks at him, seeing decisions flit in his hazel eyes.

He looked down into her eyes as he bit into his lip." Elizabeth... I..."

"What?" Looks at him, concern filling her eyes.

Breathing in, John looked at her, before closing his eyes once more. All he could think of was whether or not to kiss her and what would happen if he did.

She started to pull away again.

His arms stopped her again.

She looks at him again. "John?"

Breathing in deeply, John kept his eyes closed.

She put her hands on either side of his face and pulls him down, softly kissing him, her tongue sliding along his bottom lip as she steps closer to him, pinning him gently against the support beam.

John kept his eyes closed as she kissed him. "Hmmm..." he moaned quietly into her mouth before pulling back, but keeping his eyes closed.

"I'm not going to disappear, John. You can kiss me back." Slides her hands to his chest.

He didn't respond.

She steps back and turns to the ocean.

John stayed routed to the same spot, his eyes staying closed.

She stands there, watching the waves. She knew she shouldn't have kissed him, knew he didn't feel the same as she wrapped her arms around herself and ran her hands lightly over her upper arms.

Breathing in deeply, John thought about what he wanted to do. He wanted to go to her, wanted to kiss and make love to her there and then but something was stopping him. _/What is wrong with you John? She wants you... Elizabeth actually wants you and you are doing nothing about it.../_ "Eli..." he shook his head as he finally opened his eyes. "Elizabeth..."

With her hands still running along her upper arms, she turns. "Yes?"

He swallowed again, turning his head slightly away from her. What was stopping him from kissing hr. "Elizabeth... I... I wa... "

"It's okay, John. I shouldn't have forced you." She backed away. "I'll be in my office if you want to talk." Starts to walk off.

"Don't go..." he said, closing his eyes once more.

She stops and turns.

Breathing deeply, John opened his eyes, finally looking at her, a confused and slightly hurt expression in his eyes.

She stood there, not sure what to do. She walked back to the railing and leaned against it. "What is wrong?"

John's eyes followed her. "Elizabeth... I want... I..." he screwed up his eyes as he tried to force himself to speak.

"You can talk to me, John." She watches him.

Breathing in once more, John suddenly moved towards and grabbed her head, pulling it towards him and kissing her furiously, all of his emotions taking over.

She yelps in surprise, but soon melts into him, her hands sliding up under his jacket again as she steps closer to him as she can get, opening her mouth to his. "Mmm..."

His body pushed her up against the railing as his hands held onto her face, his lips kissing her passionately. His tongue moved along her lower lip before finding her mouth.

She relented to him, allowed him to do what he felt he needed to do, following him in her own need as she raked her nails down his back and moved her hips against him and the railing.

John groaned loudly into her mouth before pulling back.

She kept her eyes closed as she sighed softly and held him close.

He opened his eyes and looked around. Suddenly, the balcony doors began to open.

She jumped back and looked out at the ocean.

John coughed as Carson walked out onto the balcony.

"Colonel Sheppard there you are... you were due in the infirmary ten minutes a go". John shook his head. "Doc i'm fine..." he said, staring at him.

Carson shook his head.

"Well at least get some rest son..."

John nodded, before locking his eyes on Elizabeth's.

"I'll go to my quarters". _/I hope she gets the message.../_

Carson smiled. "That'll do Colonel".

John looked at both of them before walking through the door and quickly making his way to his quarters.

She turns and grins at Carson. "Better make the rounds. Excuse me." Leaves, finding a shortcut to John's quarters.

John paced around his quarters, hands on his hips.

She waves her hand over the chime of the door controls.

John turned to face the door. "Come in..."

Waves her hand again and waits for the door to open, then walks in, seeing him standing there all shades of sexy.

The sight of her in his room made John move quickly to her, grabbing her face in his hands, kissing her more passionately than before.

She moaned at the feel of him against her as she put her hands on his back and kissed him back just as passionately, if not more.

As the doors closed, John pushed Elizabeth's back up against them as his tongue explored her mouth, his hands doing the same to her body.

Moans as she lifted her arms and kissed him back, the cool metal of the doors against her skin.

John groaned as he felt her hands on him. "Elizabeth..." _/God she feels so good.../_ His body pressed up against hers as he began to feel himself want her more and more.

She pushed him back and turned them around, falling backwards onto his bed.

Johns hand made its way down her thigh as the other began to slide up inside the front of her shirt, all the while his lips kissing her neck.

She arched her neck, turning her face to allow him access as she lifted her hips up to his hand. "Mmm, John."

John groaned into her neck as his hand found her breasts, moving over them gently, the other holding onto her thigh and moving her leg to around his waist.

Slides her leg around his waist as she slides her hands up his arms, succumbing to his touches. "John..."

He moved his mouth away from her neck so that he could look into her eyes.

She looked at him, wondering if this was wise, but deep down she wanted him. Almost losing him made her realize it. "This changes things."

John nodded slightly. "I know..."

"You sure?" She asked, she didn't want to force him and would understand if he said he wanted to stop.

John looked down at her, the familiar grin present on his face.

"What?" She wasn't quite sure what that grin meant.

He then moved his mouth down to hers, his tongue slipping inside and tasting her. His growing desire for her apparent as he pressed himself against her, his hands trying to move her bra out of the way so that he could please her.

She moaned softly against his mouth as her hands pushed at his jacket and her foot slid along his leg

John moved his shoulders to make it easier for her to remove his jacket, all the while his hand moving around to her back, attempting to undo the clasp that lay there.

She pulled away from his lips. "John...jacket...off." She panted as she pulled at his jacket.

He simply nodded in response, before sitting up and pulling his jacket off.

She pulled his shirt off as well, throwing it across the room, knocking something down with a small crash.

John didn't pay attention, but stayed looking down at her, his desire now straining against his pants.

She pulled his lips back down, sliding her tongue into his mouth

He groaned loudly. The strain beginning to become painful as his hands made their way round to her back, trying to open the clasp once more.

She sits up a little as he is able to reach now, her hands pulling at his pants

John's eyes closed and he bit into his lip as he felt her fingers touching his skin. "Eliza..."

"Shh. Just feel, John." Slides her hands along the belt line, pulling them open at the button and fly, sliding her hands inside.

John shook slightly as her hands slid inside. "Mmmmm..." It had been too long since a woman had touched him this way. "Oh god Elizabeth..."

She looked at him and pushed at his pants. "So tight...God Bless America." She grinned at him.

John smiled slightly, his eyes staying closed. "Mmmmm".

"Hmm." She slid her hands along his hips to his rear. "Ooh, thank you Air Force."

He laughed slightly, moving his hands to her hair.

Watches him with darkening green eyes.

John opened his eyes and looked down at her, wondering why she had stopped. "Elizabeth"? He asked, his voice almost pleading.

"Just watching you. You're so handsome. So beautiful." She runs her hands up his bare back, her nails trailing along his spine.

Shivering as her hands moved over his back, John closed his eyes once more. "Oh god Elizabeth..."

"Yes?"

"Please... oh god please..."

"What?"

"I...I..." his voice caught in his throat as his hands moved in her hair."Please..."

Trails her nails down his back. "Please what, John?"

John groaned loudly, his eyes clasped shut. "Elizabeth... please... "

She pushes on his pants with her toes and tries to get them off him.

John got to his knees and tried quickly remove his belt, failing miserably.

She sits up and helps him.

"Oh god... Elizabeth..." John moaned, his head tilting back as her fingers worked.

Opens his belt and then pushes his pants down, sliding her hands along his thighs.

He moved his hands to her hair once more, groaning loudly.

She lies back once she gets them off him and looks at him, scooting back onto the bed proper.

John looked down at her for a few seconds, before moving himself over her, his mouth finding hers. Then, his hands moved to her trousers and began to push them down. "Oh god Elizabeth..." he moaned into her mouth.

She kissed him back, lifting her hips to allow him to pull them down, her hands finding the back of his head

Once her pants were off, John moved his hands to her top, beginning to push it over her head.

She sits up and lifts her arms, her eyes on his.

Lifting the shirt over her head, John's eyes looked deeply into hers. "Elizabeth..." he said, moving his lips to hers as he knelt before her.

She put her arms around his neck and pulled him to her and kissed him deeply.

His tongue moved against hers as he sat back and pulled her into his lap.

She moved into his lap, feeling herself throb at the feel of him close to her. "Mmm, John." Her tongue duelled with his.

John moved his hand between them, beginning to tease her throbbing.

She gasped and moved up to allow him room. "Oooh..."

His fingers slid inside of her, as he kissed her neck, his member moving against her thighs.

She cried out softly at the feel of his fingers and lips on her neck, moving against him with a soft moan.

John wanted her badly, his whole body aching for her. "Elizabeth..."

"Yes..."

"I want you... god I need you..." he said, moving his lips along her collar bone as she sat atop of him, his fingers working inside of her.

She moaned and moved against his fingers, her knees bent at his hips as she sat on his lap, used her muscles to move herself.

He moved his fingers out of her.

She whimpered at the loss. "Mmm..."

John then used his hand to slowly guide himself inside of her, his lips moving across her chest.

"Hunnnn..." The sound was strangled as she fought to keep quiet as she felt him slide into her. "John..."

"Hmmm..." was all he could manage as he buried his head between her breasts, his hips moving against her.

She fell back against his hands, letting the momentum drop her down to the bed.

John stayed sitting up, using his hands to pull her over him, his head tilted back as he groaned loudly once more.

"Uhnnn..." She moaned as he filled her.

Elizabeth's moans almost sent him over the edge as he quickened their pace.

She panted and moaned, arched and dug in her nails as she slickened around him. "Oh, John..."

Hearing her say his name, John moved himself so that he was led over her and began to thrust into her, his head burying itself into her neck. "Ohhhhh god..."

She moved against his motion, the friction causing her internal sensors to go into overdrive. "John...John...oooohhh..."

Thrusting into her a few more times, john then arched his back as his seed began to spill into her. "Ohhhhhh god... Uhhhh".

She screamed out his name, latching onto him tightly.

John held onto her tightly as he shuddered. "Mmm..." he groaned into her neck.

She shuddered around him, crying out his name again.

John's body lay still.

She panted and sighed as she came around him. "Oooh, John..."

He mumbled slightly as he lay on top of her, not moving.

She held onto him, slowly moving her hips against him. "Mmm..."

John clenched his eyes closed. "..." he mumbled again, still unmoving.

"I love you." She hadn't realized she said it.

"I... I..." he wanted to respond but something was stopping him.

She saw his expression and froze. "I'm sorry."

John's mouth was clamped shut as his eyes closed tightly, his face screwing up, his whole body tensing.

She suddenly felt like a fool for speaking her heart. She tried to pull away from John.

"Eliza...hel...help..." was all he could manage to say as his face screwed up more, the pain he was experiencing now visible.

"John!?" She caught him and held him. "John please, what is it?"

John's eyes opened and looked into hers. "Help..." he said before his face screwed up in pain once more. "Argh..."

"I can't help if I don't know what's wrong, John."

Gritting his teeth, john forced himself to run over, crying out in pain once more.

She called for Carson.

His hand suddenly clutched at his chest. "Elizabeth..."

"John, please. Look at me." Is suddenly scared.

He forced his eyes open, the tear-filled orbs looking up at her. "Help..." he said as the pain seared through him."AAARRRGGGGGHHHHHH"

"Carson! Where are you!?" Her voice crying.

When the door chimed, John tried to pull the blankets over him with one hand, the other clamped to his chest.

She had dressed quickly and opened the door. "I don't know what happened."

Carson came running in and straight to John's side.

"Colonel... Oh god" he said to no one in particular as John cried out in pain once more.

"I need you to tell me exactly what you are feeling" he said calmly, not wanting to cause John any harm.

"I... pain..." John said through gritted teeth.

"... My chest... I can't move..."

Carson eyes widened, as he looked at Elizabeth.

"I think he's having a heart attack"! He said, fear and concern overwhelming his voice.

She pales, knowing that she caused this. "No." Her tears are projected into her voice.

"Colonel hold on..." Carson looked at Elizabeth, tapping his headset "I need a stretcher in Colonel Sheppard's room... STAT"!! He shouted before tapping his headset once more, his attention turning to John. Colonel... I need you to stay calm..." John looked up at Carson "Calm... I can't stay calm doc... AARRRGGGGGHHHH" Carson closed his eyes briefly, cursing silently, damning Kolya. "Elizabeth..." john asked shakily as his eyes searched for her.

She was near, but her eyes were full of tears as she began blaming herself for John's condition.

John cried out in pain again as his eyes continued to search for her. "Eli... where is she"?! He asked shakily, his voice filled with pain.

"I'm...I'm here." Her voice was shaky and emotion filled.

His hand started to search for her as Carson ran out into the corridor. "Where the bloody hell is that stretcher"?! He asked himself out loud.

Grabs his hand. "I'm here."

John clasped hold of her hand tightly as the medics entered the room with the stretcher. "Alright... let's quickly get him on this thing"! Carson shouted.

She held his hand.

Carson and the medics quickly lifted John onto the stretcher before securing him down. "NOW LET'S MOVE"!! Carson shouted as they started to push him out of the room, John's hand never leaving Elizabeth's.

She runs along side him, fear filling her.

They were quickly joined by Rodney as Carson and the medics pushed him to the infirmary. "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED"?!!! Rodney exclaimed, staring at John as they ran along.

Pulls away. "I did it."

Johns hand immediately began to search for hers.

"Elizabeth"?! He asked as they entered the infirmary and were quickly joined by Teyla and Ronon.

"Colonel Shepard"?! Teyla asked them as John was lifted onto the bed.

Carson looked at them quickly.

"He is suffering from a heart attack he said quickly, before looking back at John, who was beginning to feel numb.

"Colonel Sheppard? Can you still hear me"? He said, before barking orders around.

Drops her head as she hides her tears.

Johns hand continued to search for Elizabeth. "Eli... Eliza..." Teyla walked to Elizabeth's side placing her hand on her shoulder, trying to comfort her.

"Oh god colonel?!! Can you still hear me"?!! Carson asked, getting no response from him.

"Eliza... where..." John continued to quietly ask for her.

Cries softly as she goes to him. "I'm here. I'm here, John."

John closed his eyes as he tried to grip onto her hand, Carson trying to help him.

She grabbed his hand. "Shhh."

"His breathing is erratic" Carson told them before slipping a mask over his face. "Colonel... just stay with us" he told John as he slowly opened his eyes.

"John, please. Hang in there".

He didn't respond as his eyes started to flicker closed, the heart monitor that had been attached letting out a long beep.

"COLONEL"!!! Carson exclaimed before checking his pulse. "Oh god no".

She screamed. "JOOOOOOOOOHN, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Carson climbed onto the bed and started to do heart compressions. "Come on Colonel"!

Elizabeth held onto John's hand.

"Please… oh god John please"!! She cried, tears running down her face, not caring who saw them.

Carson began to thump on John's chest.

"Come on Colonel""!! He shouted before looking at the nurses.

"Anything"?! He asked, his eyes pleading for an answer.

The nurse shook her head.

"Damn it"!! He said, continuing to thump at John's chest.

"John... please… please" Elizabeth pleaded as Rodney folded his hands in front of his face.

Carson carried on for several minutes, sweat dripping down his face.

"Come on…" he pleaded, not wanting to lose one of his friends.

Tears were brimming in Teyla's eyes; she was unable to believe that they were losing someone who appeared so strong.

Carson suddenly stopped, when he realised that it was too late.

Looking up at the clock, tears in his own eyes.  
"15:45…." Was all he said before he said before climbing off the bed, his face pale and his eyes glazed over.

Elizabeth looked up at Carson.  
"NO… no"! She shouted before removing the face mask.

Teyla moved to her, placing her arm around her shoulder, tears running freely down her own face.  
"Elizabeth….." she said calmly.

Elizabeth looked up at her friend.

"No…" was all she said, not wanting to believe that John was gone. 

Carson turned back around and placed his hand on Johns head, then moved his hand over his eyes, closing them.

"I'm sorry….." was all he said through his tears.


End file.
